I was swiping on Tinder as I usually do when I am bored and have scrolled out all my social media apps. After reading a few weird bios I called my friends to ask if they had experienced men being rude on dating apps, or if I was just super lucky and the algorithm hated me.
Apparently, it is normal for men to be rude on their bios and say things such as “no psychos”, “no stupidity”, and “no drama”. What makes me think… If the first thing the guy knows we will see about him is how he is clearly narcissistic, how he thinks he is a prize and every woman on the planet wants him, some even call themselves “alpha male” (Yuck!), what does he expect?
I am not saying that all guys are like this, it is better to make this clear before someone starts pointing fingers at me and screaming “not all men”.
When we think we are being lucky and match with a man whose profile sounded normal, maybe a pre-made bio copied and pasted from the internet but no rudeness, the second part of the battle starts.
A good example of the things women have to deal with in the online dating world can be seen in Melanie Blake‘s story, where the columnist tells about not-good experiences she had (she even encountered a man pleasuring himself on camera).
Online dating can be dangerous, and in a world ruled by men, it is hard to get justice unless things go terribly bad. Because of that, women are coming together to help each other creating groups to share stories about their experiences, and see if the same guy is dating multiple women in supposed monogamic relationships.
But I am not a specialist, unlike Aileen Barratt from the Instagram page @tindertranslators, who wrote a book on the subject, and you can hear her speaking about it on The Irish Times’ podcast The Women’s Podcast, I am here to laugh, laugh hard at those guys.
Many times, before swipe left, I talk to myself, inclined to swipe right just in case we match I have a chance to talk to them and let them know that being rude, or proud, or acting like a disputed prize will not make women want to date him.
But then I change my mind, take a screenshot to laugh with my friends and move on. Now, I will show you some of my favourite ones so you can laugh with me.
That remembered me about a guy on hinge who was talking about dinner recipes he was going to cook for me. Would not be weird if it was not literally the third message he sent me (after “hi” and “yeah I am good too”).
Sorry, I will not tolerate this stupidity!
My 2023 favourite up to now:
I could stay here for months and still would not be able to say everything I want to say about the difficulties of contemporary dating. I guess this is a series now! Let me know your experiences with online dating in the comment section.
And if you have a good story about bad and/or good dates, funny moments, weird people you met, or any experience related to online/contemporary dating, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. If you do not want me to tell your name, let me know at the beginning that it is an anonymous story.