‘Headers’ on the train

Every Monday morning I get the train from Sligo back up to Dublin at 5.45 a.m , as if this isn’t torture enough I always seem to end up siting beside the worst possible candidates. Well I say I sit beside them rather they don’t understand that my handbag is sitting in the seat  beside me. My handbag is an obvious obstacle to the fact I’m not a social person at this time of the morning nor do I want an awkward conversation with a stranger, my train journey is three an half hours long there’s only so long I can talk about the weather, what I do in college and where I work.

The first hour and a half is usually quite pleasant but things generally get progressively worse on the train once we start to pass through Longford and there’s no hope after the Mullingar stop. So on this glorious morning two of what I can only describe as “Top Ten Ravers” arrive on the train and sit across me from, I’ll say one thing for them they did acknowledge the fact my handbag was sitting beside me. First I was amazed at how upbeat and chatty they could be in the morning, they were giggling about the weekend banter which I optimistically thought this could be entertaining but wow was I wrong.

The stories ranged from how some girl they know is an “app-salute slut” his words I would never use such a term, I won’t go into the story he told it’s still to early in the day. Then header number 1 told header number 2 how he spent all the other night puking like a waterfall and oh it was still purple the next day because he’s hardcore and drank a bottle of  Buckfast and he didn’t bother cleaning it up. Why you might ask? Because he’s a legend according to the boys.

Things took a turn to header 1 talking about going to Steve Aoki, header number 2 didn’t know who he was, because he’s not as experienced as a Top Ten Raver as I first thought he’s still listening to Mark Mc Cabe’s Maniac 2000.


Then header number 1 decided he’d show the unwise other raver some songs. I genuinely hoped they wouldn’t use headphones so I could hear what ‘tune’ they were banging out, just for  the fact this young fella thinks he’s some kind of underground music king but yet but I’ve an inkling he has Tiesto ‘adagio for strings’ as his ringtone. He did say that he had to delete all the movies off his laptop because he’d too many songs probably a combination of the his hero David Guetta and some serious original mix’s of his own taking up all of the memory.

To be fair things did get entertaining the more they talked about going to Steve Aoki, “I hope he play’s Avici ‘Levels’ that would make my night”!! Easy lads don’t ruin the cred you guys gave built up by talking about such a mainstream song. My favorite moment of this train journey was after header number 1 made out that he was going be mad out of it at Steve Aoki but yet he’s planing on been home by midnight easy Cinderella as has training the next morning. Oh so you won’t be going out to the boys on a tour of the Northside drinking cans a Tuborg the new Bavaria?

I was hopeful for some sort of redemption for their own sake but I couldn’t listen anymore after “I’m just saying I need to ease off the drink, I’ve been out every weekend in the last month, and sure we always end up in a dog pile inside Dominos”.

Morale of the story is where can I find out their names to add them on Facebook?

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