Everybody says that change is good. Which it is, but it’s also scary as hell! Some people seek change, some fear it, some have change thrust upon them, but whatever the reason we will all go through major changes in our lifetime. These changes are life lessons masked as hurt or pain. Maybe you’ve just gone through a break-up, maybe you’ve lost your job, maybe you’ve even lost a person – but you will get through this, and be stronger because of it.
I know what you’re thinking, such a cliche right? Well a year ago I would have thought the same thing. Now though, I stand in a different place. I went through a tough time but pushed myself in ways I never have before to get through it, and I can now finally say that I am genuinely happy and glad that what happened to me did, because I have ended up here. So I am here to impart my wisdom onto those who need it, those who fear change and the unknown, as I did.
The Circular spoke to Alison Keating, a psychologist from BWell Clinic, about the issue of change. She told us that when we are faced with difficulties in our lives a “motivational trigger” happens and this kicks us into change.
“The pain is a driver to expand your horizons. It opens our possibilities to new things, and forces us to take risks. The risk pays off ten fold, so the changes make us feel good. Take the risk, the uncertainty expands our life experiences.”
With Alison’s advice in mind, we compiled a list of tips and things to do when life throws tough situations at you, so that you can come out the other side a happier person.
Tackle the issue head on
My first tip would be to deal with your issue head on. As much as you would like to ignore what’s happening to you, it’s not going away so you’ll have to face it eventually. Don’t bury your head in the sand, face the bastard down! Do whatever you have to do – cry, scream, run, eat – but whatever it is just do it. There are lessons to be learned from this, so the sooner you accept the changes the better. But remember that there are no wrong ways to deal with important issues, there are no failures here, it’s very personal.
Push yourself to do something new
Push yourself! Yes, you can do it. This doesn’t mean that you have to climb Mount Kilimanjaro, but try something new that stretches you. If you love writing why not start a blog? If you like to sing why not set up a YouTube channel? Maybe get that tattoo you’ve always wanted? Or you could even apply for a new job. This new you is able for anything, be aware of that and have the confidence to believe in yourself.
Travelling anywhere is a great learning experience. Travelling somewhere you’ve never been before is an even better learning experience. If you have the money to go somewhere new for a few days then do it. If not, start saving because sometimes being somewhere new is the perfect way to gain a new perspective and to clear your head. A bit of sun never hurt anyone either so why not choose somewhere warm? Vitamin D has been proven to help fight depression, and it’s important to keep a positive mind when going through changes.
Talk it out
When you go through a rough patch you really see who is truly there for you. This in itself is an amazing discovery. It’s important to have people you trust in your life, even if it’s just one or two people, especially during times of stress or sadness. These people care about you and only want the best for you so when you need to talk things through or need advice you know that they have your best interest at heart.
Last but not least, I advice you to find happiness again. Do this is whatever way you know how – laugh with friends, get outdoors, accomplish something you’ve always wanted to. A small step may be all you need. And if you find that coming to terms with the changes in your life is harder than you thought, then live in the knowledge that you are doing all you can to make yourself happy at this moment.
So PLEASE go forth and embrace change! Now is a wake up call and a chance to shake up your life, and who knows, maybe it will be the best thing for you? Apply for that internship you never dreamed you could get, go to America for the first time, take the Masters course you didn’t think you’d be able for, and realize that you have the best friends and family in the world- I know I did!