Let’s rip the band-aid off from the jump. You cannot rush into a good thing. Everything good is a slow burn.
We are all out here living in this weird instant glitch where we feel like if we haven’t hit our career peak, mastered a whole new skill set, and figured out our entire five-year plan by next Tuesday, we’re somehow behind. We want the result, we want the after photo, and we want it delivered in 30 minutes or less with free shipping.
But here’s the thing life does not work that way.
I’ll be real with you, I’ve been in a total funk lately. I have these big goals for my creative work, and I’ve been feeling so frustrated that things aren’t moving at the speed of light. I was starting to do that thing where you compare your behind-the-scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel, and it’s exhausting.
Then, two things happened that snapped me out of it.
The Aha Moment
First, I was hanging out in the kitchen watching my flatmate, Saoirse, work her magic on some American-style chilli when she said something that stuck with me.
“You can’t turn the heat up all at once”.
Now, on the surface, she was just talking about not burning the onions or making sure the spices didn’t get bitter. But it was the first part of what got me out of the funk I’ve been in lately. I realised I’d been trying to turn the heat up all at once on my entire life. I wanted my creativity to be perfect now, my goals to be reached yesterday, and my career to be fully formed this morning.
Thinking back on what she said made me realise that by trying to force everything to happen at once, I was just going to burn myself out. Which to be fair, was already happening.
The 13-Year “Overnight” Success
So, I’m sitting there, smelling the chili and realizing I’ve been trying to cook my life at 200°C when I should have been let it simmer. But even with that realization, a part of me was still fighting it. I kept thinking, “Okay, but surely some people just get lucky? Surely it doesn’t HAVE to take this long?”
That’s when I watched an episode of the I Said What I Said podcast with guest, Uche Natori.
If you know, you know, Uche is a literal icon in the beauty and content space. Her growth was massive. But as I was listening, she dropped a reality check that felt like a bucket of cold water. She mentioned that she’s been doing content for thirteen years.
Thirteen. Years.
Let that sink in. We see her now and think “goals,” but we forget about the decade plus of low and slow work she put in before the rest of the world even noticed the pot was boiling. The hosts, Jola and FK, hit the nail on the head too. They talked about how everyone jumping into social media or creative industries today expects to be a household name by next month. We’ve become obsessed with the “overnight success” narrative, forgetting that those “overnights” are usually backed by thousands of days of staying consistent when nobody was watching.
You can watch the full pod here.
Trusting the “Marination”
Hearing that from someone as successful as Uche was the final piece of the puzzle for me. It’s easy to feel like you’re failing when you’re actually just in the “marination” phase. Just like with cooking, we have a phase where we just need to sit and wait patiently to have a better result.
Just like Saoirse’s chilli, the best parts of our lives, our careers, our personal growth, our creative voices need time for the flavours to actually meld. If I force it now, I’m just giving the world a half-baked version of myself.
I’m learning to stop looking at the clock and start looking at the heat. Am I staying consistent? Am I letting the process happen? Am I trusting that “good things take time” isn’t just a cheesy quote, but a literal law of nature? To be honest sometimes I am, other time, not so much.
But I can confidently say to you, as someone who is going through the exact thing you probably are; turn the stove down. Whether you’re a student, a mum, or a creative trying to find your way, give yourself permission to simmer. The wait isn’t wasted time, it’s the secret ingredient. I promise, the version of you that arrives in five or ten years will be so much richer and happier because you didn’t try to rush the process today.
A Little Something for Your Playlist
Before I go, I wanted to share a song that has been on repeat for me while I navigate this marination phase. It’s “Lifeboat” by Raye.
If you’re feeling like you’re just treading water while you wait for things to click, give this a listen. It’s the perfect song to help you get through the week when the pressure feels like a bit much. Sometimes you just need a track that acknowledges the struggle while you wait for the tide to turn.
Wrapping Up Now
So, if you are feeling tired and drained, remember you are not alone. Remember, to turn the heat down a bit.
Let us know in the comments, how did you get yourself out of the funk?
