THE CIRCULAR

Cohabitation and Celibacy between unmarried couples.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.

There are probably two groups of people who would argue this topic differently because they belong to two different schools of thought, however, I would not necessarily say that there is a right or wrong way to discuss the topic above. Every human is different and so are their personal preferences and ideologies of how things work in life.

Cohabitation is something that most likely everyone in the world has had to do at some point in their lives with either family members, close friends, acquaintances or strangers or even lovers. Still, for the sake of this topic, we shall be focusing solely on cohabitation between unmarried partners.

On the one hand, the more traditional individuals would argue that cohabitation before marriage may not be the ideal thing to do as it could spring up a sense of “see finish” as Nigerians would say, which simply means “lack of value”. This group of individuals cherish their personal space and believe that the scarcity of their partner creates more value for them, regardless of the amount of love they may share.

On the other hand, there is a group of people who believe that cohabitation before marriage is a necessity that has to happen in order to avoid any form of a surprise in marriage. This class of individuals do not believe in “lack of value” as they would rather have their partner in their space almost a 100% of the time, so as to know them thoroughly before fully committing.

Photo by Katerina Holmes from Pexels.

When it comes to Celibacy, which is the second half of this topic, there are also differing mindsets and ideologies towards it. For some, unmarried partners have absolutely no business cohabiting as this creates room for temptation, which would eventually lead to partaking in sexual intercourse before marriage, thereby throwing celibacy out of the window.

For others who are of the opinion of “testing the waters”, sexual compatibility is a huge deal-breaker that they cannot compromise on. For them, this will determine whether or not a relationship has the potential of moving further to the next level, being marriage.

Ultimately, I would say that cohabitation and celibacy could work if both parties involved are well-aware and are a thousand and one per cent committed to the cause.

Please click on the attachment below if you would like to listen to me discuss more on cohabitation and celibacy with a guest on my podcast series.

DISCLAIMER: This podcast episode is highly rated 18+.

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One Response

  1. Lol! The disclaimer got me. This was really insightful. I personally don’t think cohabitation can happen without sexual intercourse so if you really want to be celibate just kuku sitdown for your house. There are other ways to get to know your partner without living with them 24/7. I really enjoyed this though. Looking forward to the next one!

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