Let me take you down memory lane, create a picture of this scenario. It seems to you that everything is not going as planned. You just got back from school and it has been a hectic day as usual. You worked so hard, but your Boss at work seems not to appreciate the efforts you put in.
On the other hand, the challenges of life stare right at you in the face. So you say to yourself, ‘I can’t handle this no more’. It seems to you the world is closing in on you. You reach for your room, close the door and lay on the bed. You just want to end it all. You reach for your backpack, you grab a pen and your notepad.
You take out time to put down some words. You are done writing and it does appear like a suicide note. You read through it over and over again. Your heart beats so fast as you brace up for the journey ahead. You look at yourself in the mirror with tears rolling down your cheek.
You reach for those pills, you open your mouth and swallow them all. You know the journey has started. You lay on your bed, putting the letter just where it can be seen. You start recalling the lyrics of your favorite song by James Blunt
Trouble is her only friend and he’s back again.
Makes her body older than it really is.
She says it’s high time she went away,
No one’s got much to say in this town. Trouble is the only way is down,down, down.
As strong as you were, tender you go.
I’m watching you breathing for the last time
Then you close your eyes, and it becomes clear to you that you are gone. It’s 17:00 , your mum gets back from work, she fixes lunch and calls out to you. She doesn’t get a response. She knows you are home. She walks to your room. Taps on the door. You don’t respond, she walks in.
The paper lying right beside you catches her attention. She tries to wake you up,but it is a cold response. It dawns on her something isn’t right and then she reads through the note. She can’t help it, she screams and cries uncontrollably.
She rings the emergency number, within minutes they arrive and. Your mum thinks it all a dream,but the reality of the situation hits her hard when she is told that the ‘deed is done’
The next day in college, the news of your suicide filters in to air. Your course mates starts wondering what could have promoted such an act. Your best friends can’t help it, they are so wrecked. That young man now hates himself, that young woman now hates herself for failing to tell you how handsome, how pretty you were.
He felt worst for not letting you know how so much he was in love with you. She felt sad as well. It suddenly becomes a strange world. Your dad looks up to the sky, muttering these words “Dear Lord, can you hear me speak?”
The date for the burial is fixed, you are lowered to the ground which signals the end of an era. Your parents can’t keep up with the pain, your dad becomes a regular visitor at the pub, coming home drunk.
On the other hand, depression is having its toll on your mum. A once happy family starts to fall apart. Your action have brought your family and friends to their toes.
But as sad as it may seems, you haven’t pushed the STOP button. At every stage of one’s life, we encounter challenges, but we should always remember that the challenges of today are what defines and shape us into who we become tomorrow.
Never be shy to seek help, say no to suicide, One for all, one for all. There is always someone out there to listen.