“The Fear” is the sense that you have done yourself some ever-lasting damage after a night of drinking. And let’s face it we’ve all experienced varying degrees of this chronic illness.

Kristen Wiig Gif
Symptoms include:

– A feeling that you will die. Soon. (Not due to hangover symptoms)
– A sense that people or organisations are out to get you.
– Angst that you may have offended, inappropriately touched or physically attacked someone the night before.
– Heart Palpitations – a result of the Red Bull you mixed with EVERYTHING – Jagermeister, Vodka, Agwa, Captain Morgan and tequila. Yes tequila, it seemed like such a great idea at the time.
– Foreboding about the next time you meet the people or “friends” you were with or return to the bar where you so outrageously degraded yourself the night before.
– You lost your phone? In fairness, you feel a little better for it. There’s no evidence – texts, phone calls or pictures – that can drag you deeper into the hole you’ve taken up residence in for the time being.

Dtupid things

The Fear is often accompanied by “The Remorse”, where you are so genuinely ashamed and sorry for the way you have behaved, as well as simply frightened for your own well-being.

Concerned friend: “How are you? How was last night?”
Sufferer: “I’m riddled with Fear.”

You are unable to sleep and can’t stop thinking of the different ways you’ve made a complete imbecile of yourself. You can’t stop playing certain “hilarious” scenarios in your head and now realize that there’s a reason you haven’t heard from that guy/girl you had a crush on. Crap. You text your ex? SHITE!

Sometimes “the cure” or “the rollover”, i.e. drinking the following day, eases the paranoia and panic attacks, however, in reality the hair of the dog just prolongs the torture. Although in the short term you’ll dampen the shakes, the body ends up dealing with more toxins and more severe effects will result – shakes will become earthquakes. Unfortunately the only cure is time, a comedy that ultimately results in tears helps this time push along.

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You may NEVER DRINK AGAIN but mysteriously come down with this dreadful disease the following Sunday. Again.

Hangover Willy Wonka